Cinnamon Gum

Farewell, my little temptress
I’m through trying to impress you
I think
I think I think too much
I’m depressed and distressed
And though I kind of miss you
We have issues we can’t resolve
That won’t dissolve in a glass of whisky
Just hanging out feels risky
I feel frisky all the same
Is it you or me to blame?
Am I too lazy to look beyond you?
We’re too crazy to be Beyonce and Jay-Z
And too white
Can’t fight that
Or talk it through on facebook chat
Two hipsters throwing out the welcome mat
For each other’s demons
Seeming innocuous while probing for defects
I don’t need a pretext
To do the wrong thing
I can write that song, sing it solo
Can you tell me what we shared, though?
A day on the indie rock scene
What’s it mean?
Summer breezes
Sunlight shining through the trees
But Jesus, it was gray as hell
Like you said, I can’t dispel that notion
Feeling swell but riding swells of emotion
Up and down like the ocean
Did we get high or low looking through each other’s eyes
To the twisted souls inside?
I’m dismayed you can’t hide that better from me
Just like I despise the lies
I tell myself about you
Did we want to be together or just circle like dancers
Looking for answers about the cancers
Eating away at us?
Compatible diseases?
Who knows? I don’t know why
You freeze when we say goodbye
Or maybe I do
I didn’t know that was what it was for sure, I think
But I think I had a clue
When time passed slow
With no text from you
Did you just want a companion for a dark road trip?
Slip off into oblivion together?
Or did you just want someone to hang out with
And bag upon the hipsters?
Hope stirs in my breast when I think this
With no reason, maybe pride
Maybe you wanted to hide
Or thought I was taking you for a ride
Still I feel denied
For the end was what it was
Sun setting, time for Pavement
Heart sinking like cement
Alone in my own Terror Twilight
Another night that turned out wrong
Though I don’t know what would have been right
I should have known it all along
I’m still checking the phone to see if you’ve rung
The tang of your cinnamon gum
Fading on my tongue
Who knows what it meant?
All this flavor with no nourishment
But it shows that I forget
The one thing I can say with precision
Swallow you or spit you out
Is not just a girl’s decision